How NOT to greet your husband when he comes home from work

06 Jun

For many years, my husband and I have worked opposite shifts. We have done this for so long that I am actually not sure how long it’s been since we worked at the same time. I think maybe when we both worked at a corporate bookstore together and had recently started dating. That was about 16 years ago.

We maintained the opposite shifts for a long time so we wouldn’t have to pay for daycare, but it has one obvious major drawback – we almost never see each other. Currently I have a nice, cushy job with regular day hours Monday-Friday; he works Monday-Friday in the evenings. As a result, I am often asleep when he gets home.

Last night when he came home I was apparently sprawled all over the bed, leaving no room for him whatsoever. So he gently woke me up and asked me to move back over to my side of the bed. My back was a little sore so I decided to stretch while I was rolling over. As I stretched out my arms and legs, my body thought that would be a prime opportunity to let loose a couple of tremendous farts.

Damn, I am one sexy lady. Cuz you know, nothing says romance quite like hogging the bed and farting your hellos. No wonder we’re still together after 15 years; if you could come home to that every night, why would you ever leave?


Posted by on June 6, 2012 in Family Life, Schadenfreude for you


Tags: , ,

11 responses to “How NOT to greet your husband when he comes home from work

  1. Molmae

    June 13, 2012 at 9:13 am

    I just read a few of your posts, and I’m pretty sure we must be related. These have been cracking me up, thanks! I even had my husband read some so he could see I’m not the only one πŸ™‚

    • karifur

      June 13, 2012 at 9:25 am

      Anytime! πŸ˜€

  2. Pish Posh

    June 13, 2012 at 9:11 pm

    Adorable. Also that your name is Karifur. Love it. πŸ™‚ Do you have a friend name Jennifer? PYHO

    • karifur

      June 13, 2012 at 9:13 pm

      As a matter of fact I do have a friend named Jennifer. πŸ™‚

  3. sparkling74

    June 15, 2012 at 6:57 pm

    Hysterical. Found you at finding the funny.

  4. Anna

    June 15, 2012 at 7:37 pm

    too funny, another one here from Finding the Funny!

  5. fargojones

    June 18, 2012 at 9:35 pm

    Sometimes a nice fart is all you need to say to each other.

  6. Anna Whitney Luther

    June 19, 2012 at 12:40 pm

    Hilarious! You were one of the most-clicked at #findingthefunny. We’re featuring you tomorrow, and pinning this post! Thanks for linking up! Anna @ My Life and Kids

    • karifur

      June 19, 2012 at 12:46 pm

      How exciting! Thank you!

  7. Meredith

    June 20, 2012 at 6:05 am

    Sounds like you definitely know how to keep the spark alive πŸ˜‰


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