For many years, my husband and I have worked opposite shifts. We have done this for so long that I am actually not sure how long it’s been since we worked at the same time. I think maybe when we both worked at a corporate bookstore together and had recently started dating. That was about 16 years ago.
We maintained the opposite shifts for a long time so we wouldn’t have to pay for daycare, but it has one obvious major drawback – we almost never see each other. Currently I have a nice, cushy job with regular day hours Monday-Friday; he works Monday-Friday in the evenings. As a result, I am often asleep when he gets home.
Last night when he came home I was apparently sprawled all over the bed, leaving no room for him whatsoever. So he gently woke me up and asked me to move back over to my side of the bed. My back was a little sore so I decided to stretch while I was rolling over. As I stretched out my arms and legs, my body thought that would be a prime opportunity to let loose a couple of tremendous farts.
Damn, I am one sexy lady. Cuz you know, nothing says romance quite like hogging the bed and farting your hellos. No wonder we’re still together after 15 years; if you could come home to that every night, why would you ever leave?