Today I went to the doctor for my annual checkup. I always know it’s time for my annual checkup because I call the pharmacy to refill my prescriptions, and then later that day someone at the clinic calls me and says “Hey, it’s been over a year. If you want more drugs you gotta come see us, mmkay?”
Category Archives: Family Life
Buckle up, friends, do I have a story for you!
It started with a phone call.
Friday night my dad called and asked if I could come over around 8. This was strange, because usually my mom is the one who calls me, though it’s not unheard of for my dad to call. We were just getting ready for our regular game night with our friends, which usually lasts until 10:30. I wouldn’t be able to stop over that evening. He said he needed to talk to me about something, but not over the phone. I said I could stop by the coffee shop where he goes in the mornings. No, he said, could I come by their place at around 10 am instead? I agreed.
Parenting teenagers can be really difficult sometimes. They don’t listen. They talk back. They scream at you. You are the worst mom in the whole world. So-and-so’s mom would never make her kids do that. They hate you. You ruin EVERYTHING. They can’t wait to move out of your house and live their own lives without you breathing down their necks all the time.
But then…. sometimes a little thing can happen that makes you forget all of that, even if it’s just for a little while. You get a tiny breakthrough.
As many of you might be aware, I am a dog person. I mean, I am a person who loves dogs, not a person who is part dog as well as person. Obviously. Anyway, I have always loved dogs as far back as I can remember. One time when I was about 4 years old and I snuck out of the house (frightening the crap out of my poor babysitter) so I could sneak into a neighbor’s garage to play with their puppies.*
In what is probably a classic stroke of ironic karma, nearly all of the dogs I have had in my life have managed to sneak off at least once, much like I did all those years ago. Not to point fingers, but usually it is because some younger humans leave a door or gate open when they shouldn’t. Sometimes the dogs came back when we called them, sometimes we found them while out combing the neighborhood, and sometimes they were returned to us by friendly folks who got our phone number off their name tags. Anyway, they’ve always come back to us in one way or another, but that doesn’t make it any less terrifying when it happens; I always worry that this will be the time when they don’t come back at all.
After dinner on Tuesday my teenagers asked to go to the library. And by “asked”, I mean repeatedly begged. And by “after dinner”, I mean starting the minute I got home from work and continuing every 15 minutes after that. Normally there’s no time for this kind of thing on a weeknight but thanks to the miracle of our crockpot a perfectly cooked roast was waiting for me when I got home from work and we were done eating by 6:30. Since we still had a couple of hours before I send the kids to bed,* I decided a visit to the library would be a nice way to spend the evening.
HOWEVER… Instead of accompanying them into the library, lounging around playing games on my phone and wasting time on Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter, etc as I usually do, I decided to do something I had not done in a while. I went to the gym with the intention of running on the treadmill.
I know. I’ll give you a moment to pick your jaw up off the floor and/or clean up the milk you just snorted out of your nose.
This morning my coworker noticed that the toilet in the bathroom near our office was plugged. What follows is the paraphrased conversation that ensued.
Mary (a coworker): Hey Deb, the toilet is clogged and I can’t get it cleared with the plunger. Would you call a plumber please?
Deb (other coworker): Kari, you’re probably good at that. Why don’t you give it a try?
Me: Umm.. Why would I be good at that, specifically?
Deb: Well, you’re good at everything else.
Me: Hard to argue with that logic.
As it turns out, I am good at plunging toilets because I did in fact manage to clear the clog. All those years of having children who don’t flush the toilet has finally paid off apparently.